A prayer for the stressed

Grant me the serenity to accept things I cannot change,
The courage to change things that I cannot accept
and most of all
The wisdom to hide the bodies of the people that I had to kill today because they pissed me off!

May I be given the foresight to be careful of the toes that I step on today
As they may be connected to the arse that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

That I might always give 100% at work

12% Mondays
23% Tuesdays
40% Wednesdays
20% Thursdays
5%†† Fridays

And help me to be mindful thatÖ

When Iím having a really bad day and it seems that people are trying to piss me off that it takes 42 muscles to frown

But only 4 to extend my arm and smack the bastard in the mouth!