was the romantic past better?

As Karen and I were about to start watching our video recording of Friday night’s programmes we noted that the Waltons was on television.  At the finish of the video we saw that Little House on the Prairie was on,

Is this wholesome overload?  I asked. 
Life seemed so much better then, after all they only had diptheria and tuberculosis to worry about. 

This set my mind in motion I started pondering some of the terrors of modern life.

One of the many things that troubles me is how we import so much from the States, for instance ‘Trick or Treat’, it amazes me how extortion with menaces has been raised to cultural acceptance. 
I thought what has happened to traditional customs when kids stood on street corners with a pram full of old clothes arranged with varying skill and asked you if you would give a ‘penny for the Guy’.
 You had a choice in those days now it’s give us something or we’ll do something nasty.

The joys of the touch tone telephone are almost endless, you phone a number in the vain hope of talking to a human being to explain your problem then the fun begins.  As soon as you press the button you are taken on a rollercoaster ride to who knows where, the only certainties are you’ll hear a load of stupid music, get very frustrated and never talk to anyone who can solve your problem.  You’ll probably forget who you’re talking to and why you phoned them in the first place at but you’ll have the pleasure of knowing that your phone bill has increased.

 Despite the fact that we are living longer, advertisements and the media are doing their level best to make our lives seem shorter.  Have you noticed that Christmas seems to start about September and you are encouraged to book your summer holidays by television advertisements starting on Boxing Day.  Even this hardened veteran was shocked at the TV when it was announced that Cadbury’s Cream Eggs were back in the shops just after Christmas, I mean, cor blimmee strike a light it’s not Easter until the end of April.
 
As a matter of fact we had our first hot cross buns in the week after Christmas.

Just to show how Old I’m getting, I’m outraged that kids of 4 wear designer clothing and carry mobile phones, schools are now offering pension advice at career sessions (how long until the funeral directors move in?)  If you haven’t had a serious love affair by 12 you’re probably going to be left on the shelf. Whatever happened to childhood, it used to last nearly to teenage, do you remember making up your own games?  Now you don’t have to anymore, all you need is a Playstation, let someone else make them up for you.  Kids now only need to be able to walk the distance from their front door to the car.

I have recently noticed that supermarkets are selling organic milk, apparently it comes from cows that have been fed on grass.  This was a real surprise to me….  I always thought milk came from Sainsbury’s.

  Have you seen the BT internet advert? Apparently all you need to do to get on the internet is to dial an e-mail address.  Call me stupid if you like but how do you contact an e-mail address if you’re not on the internet?
 

We no longer worry about Heaven and Hell, there is a far more interesting question in our lives, where in the universe does the money go for four days after it leaves your account and before it arrives with the payee?   

 

An enigma of Biblical proportions.

 

Karen recently saw ‘free range sausages’ on sale in the supermarket.  We were both troubled by this, does this mean there are herds of sausages in our Green and Pleasant Land and do they use sausage dogs to round them up?

Now that I am on a roll had that you noticed that the statements made in the media often state the opposite to what actually happens. 

 

"We have every confidence in the performance of this individual." 

 

Usually means they are for the chop or

 

"we have no plans in that direction." 

 

means it's almost a certainty.

 

Is that the People's front of Judaea or the Judean People's front is our usual comment regarding various political or terrorist factions.

 
As we turned off the television I couldn’t help thinking about Michael Landon’s wonderfully coiffured hair, was there a

‘Little Hairdresser’s on the Prairie’ close to the little house?

Ralph ‘misery guts’ Edmunds

ps I recently heard and article on radio four in which somebody had written a piece complaining about the “youth of today” and their lack of respect, I thought this is going to be from a hundred years ago but I was totally shocked when the complaint had been made by somebody in ancient Greece. 

Seems to be nothing new under the sun.